How to Perfectly Grow Your Relationship - 5 Most Important Things You Should Hide in a Relationship

How to Perfectly Grow your relationship 5 most important things to hide

As I continue my article series on how you can perfectly grow your relationship, I will love to highlight on the 5 most important things you should endeavor to always hide in your relationship.

Some things are simply not meant to be revealed about your relationship, no matter how close you are with a friend or family member because anybody can use these things you revealed to act and speak against you, even in the event of a slight misunderstanding between you and person. Telling your friend every misunderstanding between you and your partner is totally not healthy for a romantic relationship.

In most cases, women especially, tend to be truthful and very much upfront with a close pal concerning her relationship; It's good you have a friend to share your innermost feelings with, but here's a thing you should know about saying it all - You don't have anything left in the bag to surprise your friend, in case she ever turns up against you tomorrow. Saying and revealing everything about your relationship is toxic and can hamper the growth of your relationship. As long as these things aren't centered on violence, it's always better to keep some things secret between both of you.  

You should understand the slim difference between friendship and relationship, and between secrecy and privacy. It's always good that you observe these differences and never cross the lines if you value, and intend to continually grow your relationship with love and respect for each other. I am going to say it for the umpteenth time, lots of relationships have crumbled on this account.

There's generally that excitement when you and your partner are in a happy relationship and it's understandable that such excitement can trigger and make you slip out some intimate things about your partner to your friend or family member. No matter the level of happiness in the home or how deep in love you're with your significant other, maturity says that some issues and intimate things about the both of you should remain private and confidential.

Remember that when you allow full access of your private lives to friends and family, you're are all the same as a company selling public shares and inviting all and sundry to partake in the open public offers. You have in the same vein given them permission to make your private life a social topic. This can lead to quarrels, misunderstandings, and enmity with them when you discover how far your private life has traveled. But I think there's something more important you should consider first - this can lead to fights and separation from your partner especially when they aren't comfortable with the friend in the first place.

1. Stop Blabbing - Hide Your Excitement

You should stop blabbing about how good your relationship is; about the beautiful experience you share with your partner. You should stop blabbing about how nice he treats you and about the many promises he fulfills. Your friend's relationship might not be that rosy, and she might have been keeping it away from you. Learning about yours can make her grow jealous. She might not have the woman-power to seduce your partner, but she's going to bear that jealousy in her heart and silent resentment against you. As you blab on, these friends of yours might in fact respond with a smile, but what you don't know is that you're innocently hurting her feelings. So most times it's always good to know the other person's wellbeing in a relationship before you start talking about yours. In the African context, this could be very dangerous as some friends can go the long distance of plotting to hurt you. It's normal to discuss your relationship with a friend, but be very observant who you discuss with, and be mindful that some aspect of your love life should never be discussed.

2. Hide Your Bedroom Activities

I will begin here with a story. Once upon a time, a woman shared how well in bed her husband was and the next day her friend is in bed with her husband and the next month, her husband prefers her friend in bed, and the next year, her friend is married to her husband and she's now a single mother. Funny way to narrate a story I guess! But that's how funny your relationship with your partner will turn if you don't learn how to keep your private life to yourself. I am a man and I am categorically telling you that it only takes a Godly man to keep disciplined the randy nature of his third leg.

Let me tell you another story - this time about a man I know who brags often about the prowess of his girlfriend in bed. I know you're waiting to hear how it ended...well, it ended the way it would normally end. One of his friends is way too richer than him and way too endowed there...and the girl fell for it. The story ended rather uglier because his friend dumped the girl because he considered her too light in bed.

Now, these two were actually made for each other, but the fact that they couldn't hide some very important things in their relationship and keep their private lives private brought about the end of a perfect relationship. Learn how to grow your relationship by keeping some things hidden. It doesn't matter how tiny the information is, your bedroom activities with your partner should remain secret, private, and under lock and key except in rare cases like when you're seeing a doctor or a marriage counselor together. Even when you're experiencing problems like performance difficulty in bed, please deal with it maturely or as I mentioned, you can share it professionally for solutions, not suggestions or discussions with friends.

3. Hide Your Misunderstandings and Arguments

This is where it gets tricky. It's very much likely you get good and comforting words from a close friend, family members, even strangers about how you can manage misunderstandings with your spouse. In fact, these people help in mending a home when there's a misunderstanding between partners. But here's my little tip on that; don't come up with all the details and analysis of the quarrel, especially when some part of it is shaded with privacy.

I am unapologetically a crusader against domestic violence, so if the misunderstandings and arguments are getting physical and it's fast becoming an infringement to your marital rights, please don't hesitate to shout it out immediately. You have to come out open on that note. The kind of misunderstandings and arguments I am talking about in this article are those mild and subtle ones that arise from mere misplacement of priorities, simple mistakes, and forgetfulness. This kind of misunderstandings and arguments should normally be sorted out between the both of you without involving a third party. And even when you involve a third party, you should keep to yourself the private details in it.

Come to think of it, any misunderstandings and arguments between you and your significant other that warrants the involvement of a third-party should be avoided. The only third-party in marriage should be God that united both of you together.

To grow continually in love and to keep your relationship strong, you must learn how to avoid interference and third-party involvements in petty misunderstandings and arguments.

4. Hide Your Partner’s Flaws:

I will pick scattered lines from JayZ's rap in the song - with his wife, Beyonce.

"The problem is, you dudes treat the one that you lovin'
With the same respect that you treat the one that you humpin'

And no, I ain't perfect
Nobody walkin' this earth's surface is

The only time you wear Burberry to swim
And I don't have to worry, the only worry is him
She does anything necessary for him
And I do anything necessary for her
So don't let the necessary occur, yep"

That's how to Perfectly Grow your relationship. Simply put, this is how a good relationship thrives. I am sure you observe that I used the word 'thrive'.
Yes, because we are humans, we ain't perfect and our frailties and faults are always there to see, but if only you can hide that of your partner, it'd make perfect sense. Worry, but don't let your worry affect your relationship. Don't let your worries about your partner's frailties overwhelm your love. You can work towards bringing a change, but remember that you cannot enforce a change overnight. You shouldn't, even so, worry about bringing about changes and making them live a different style of life that isn't suitable for them. Sometimes it's better to look away, ignore, and leave undiscussed and unresolved those differences between you. Couples who leave some things unresolved tends to last longer in relationships than couples who want to resolve everything. The more you delve into enforcing these changes, the more cracks you cause to the wall of your relationship.

Don't go about discussing and announcing their flaws in public places - you're most certainly robbing them of the confidence to change. Value your relationship and treat your partner with much respect as you treat yourself, and with greater respect than you treat others.

5. Hide Your Ego

You already know what this is. Ego disrupts things. The ego destroys relationships. Ego before your in-laws, Ego before your partner's friends, Ego even when you're wrong! All these get into their emotions and reduce their feelings for you. They start feeling unattached; the relationship suffers and things start falling apart. Forget your Ego no matter how lucky you feel they are to have you. Yes, I know of some men who feel like the supreme being in a relationship. Listen, forget your Ego no matter your financial status, forget your Ego no matter your educational qualifications, and forget your Ego on any other kind of assumption.


You can perfectly grow your relationship with these five most important things to hide in a relationship. I am certain that your relationship will notice a big difference when you start flying high on these rules.  You can tell us in the comments section how you feel about this topic and what you feel about these relationship rules. 

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